Divorce and Remarriage

Divorce and Remarriage:

What the Bible does, or doesn’t say.

Verses dealing with divorce:

Mal 2:16; "I hate divorce," says the LORD God of Israel.

Dt 24:1-4; If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the LORD. Do not bring sin upon the land the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance.

Mt 5:31,32 - "It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.' But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.

Mt 19:3-10 - Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?" "Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate." "Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?" Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery." The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."

Mk 10:2-12 - Some Pharisees came and tested him by asking, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?" "What did Moses command you?" he replied. They said, "Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away." "It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law," Jesus replied. "But at the beginning of creation God 'made them male and female.' 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate." When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this. He answered, "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery."

Lk 16:18 - "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery."

Ro 7:2,3 - "For example, by law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law of marriage. So then, if she marries another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress, even though she marries another man."

1 Co 7:10-17 - To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife. To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches.

3 Biblical Cases for Divorce

In a general sense, God allows only three reasons for the dissolution of a marriage.

Finding “uncleanness” in one’s wife (Dt 24:1-2)

This was recognized under the Old Testament Law and expounded on by Jesus (Mt 19:3-10)

Marital unfaithfulness. (Mt 5:31-32)

An unbelieving partner dissolving the marriage. (1Co 7:15)

In each of these cases, it seems that God is trying to protect the innocent party that is left to live their life after the marriage ends.

All divorce is brought about by sin of some kind, but not all divorces are sinful.

3 Cases involving Separation, Divorce, Remarriage and Believers

To the married I give charge, not I but the Lord, that the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, let her remain single or else be reconciled to her husband)—and that the husband should not divorce his wife" (1 Co 7:10-11).

One who separates/divorces from his/her spouse when there has been no HYPERLINK "http://www.lookup.org/divorce/" \l "4202porneia" immorality CANNOT remarry.  They are encouraged to remain single or else to be reconciled.

"To the rest I say, not the Lord, that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consent to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him" (1 Co 7:12-13).

"But if the unbelieving partner desires to separate, let it be so; in such a case the brother or sister is not bound. For God has called us to peace" (1 Co 7:15).

3 Biblical Cases for Remarriage

It must be noted that the term "remarriage" does not occur in the Bible! The Bible does allow for certain people once married to marry again. For example, the scripture teaches in several places that a widow (and by reasonable inference, a widower) can marry again (1 Ti 5:14; 1 Co 7:8-9, 39). In all three passages just cited, the term "remarry" or "remarriage" is never used. The people are simply told (and even commanded in 1 Co 9) that they can "marry". This is significant for the following reason. Once a marriage is legitimately dissolved, whether by death or legitimate divorce, then that marriage is considered utterly null in God's eyes. In other words, it is as if the marriage never was. The concept of "they are still married in God's eyes" is completely unsupported by Jesus' teachings and wrong if it is used towards widows, widowers or legitimately divorced people. Those freed from marriage by the death or legitimate divorce of a spouse are completely free of all scriptural commands towards married people. They are free in the purest sense, of God not holding anything against them, nor of God having any expectations regarding marriage commitments (that no longer exist), nor of God even considering them "once married".

Death (Ro 7:2-3)

This passage allowed a man to divorce his wife (or wives). She was then free to remarry another man. However, it did not allow a woman to divorce her husband. It is unclear what the term "uncleanness" means. Presumably it does not mean that she had committed adultery, because then she would have been executed by stoning.

Marital unfaithfulness. (Mt 5:31-32)

One who divorces because of HYPERLINK "http://www.lookup.org/divorce/" \l "4202porneia" porneia MAY remarry, because the scripture expressly states that one who divorces for any other cause, “except for”, CANNOT remarry without committing adultery.

An unbelieving partner dissolving the marriage. (1Co 7:15)

One whose unbelieving spouse leaves (divorces) them MAY remarry. In such cases, they are no longer under bondage, or bound to a spouse.  However, a believer is NOT to seek a divorce from an unbeliever.

The phrase "not bound" (ou dedoulotai) presupposes the dissolution of the marriage bond and consequently the freedom of the deserted spouse to remarry. This conclusion is supported by Paul’s affirmation in verse 39 of the same chapter that a husband’s death releases the wife from the marriage bond and frees her to marry again: "A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If the husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord" (1 Co 7:39).

The dissolution of the marriage bond by a willful and obstinate desertion is somewhat similar to the dissolution of the marriage bond by death. In both instances, the marriage relationship is terminated by the permanent departure of a spouse. Whether such a departure is caused by death or by the obstinate desertion of an unbelieving partner, the outcome is the same. The surviving spouse is released from the marriage bond and is free to remarry.

Adultery?

Except in the aforementioned cases allowing for divorce and remarriage, the act of consummating a second marriage generally involves adultery, remarriage itself is not an adulterous state. If it were considered to be adulterous in the Hebrew Scriptures, then the couple would be executed by stoning. Yet the Hebrew Scriptures indicate that couples were free to divorce and remarry. Adultery is thus only associated with the initial act of sexual intercourse. It must be confessed to God as a sin. Subsequent "sexual relations once again take on the holy and undefiled character of any valid marriage."